Dump. Blame. Ghost.

This is the harshest insult I'm capable of directing at anyone.

I direct it now, moving out of my home, at my ex-wife.

2012. Man you sucked as a friend.

And for all the others you ran this playbook on. For all their suffering, all of which they ascribe to you.

I don't blame you in 2012 for all of my problems. I never got to grieve the loss of my dad until this last year. That deferred grieving cost me my health and vitality and capacity for love. I was so afraid of your violence for 10 years I just tried to hide from you.

Now I can see my dad again, and how much I respect who he was. Mom too…I was so lucky. I understand why they refused to stay over now. But they let me know they still loved me all along. I couldn't hide my damage from them. They knew.

Loyal. Accepting. Always available. My parents. You never had that growing up, but you magnified the pattern in a way that transcended your parents and worried them. Dump. Blame. Ghost.

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