Being a good ex-wife

My ex has ghosted me for three years. During that period I've reached out with increasing anger and frustration and disappointment. I'm ashamed that someone would disregard me so much that they'd feel entitled to ghost me…especially someone who was my entire family and the center of my life for a long time.

She says that she's just trying to be a good person and can't do that because I'm critical.

This is exactly what she said to all the other people she's cut off or ignored or gaslighted or trash talked. It is always my fault, or their fault. Whoever is not in the room. Whoever has needs she doesn't feel like caring about.

Spoiled little sociopath, that one.  Or, as I said to her recently, "what an asshole!"

I am so fucking damaged by my divorce.  I am a shell of the person I was before I met my ex.  The endless abuse broke me down, and then her final set of affairs ground me into the pavement under the heel of her boots.  I am filled with shame that I allowed this abuse. 

I cannot stand up on my own very well any more.  I cannot protect myself from predators.  I need safety that hasn't ever been available to me, but I have nowhere to turn that I trust.

What makes me look like an easy target to scumbuckets like my ex-wife?