Anti-depressants and my vitality

-
I increased the dose of Zoloft I've been taking two months ago, and I don't think I'm loving the results.

I'm no happier, for one thing.

But, I feel like I'm losing my vitality. My muscles are tired all the time, getting up from chairs seems to take more effort, I'm sleepy and thinking of taking a nap constantly, and I have very little interest in social interaction.

Writing in this journal is the one activity that still seems normal. Or interesting to me.

I haven’t been a good pharma testing subject. Holidays alone and the last week I drank more…2-3 glasses of wine five nights in a row.  No question I wake up more slowly than on day when I don’t drink anything.  Getting back to that now.  If I spend less time with people I’m prone to drink less or nothing— making “happiness” a strong argument for living alone.

Weird.  Sad. But this is me now.  What a surprise even after three years of PTSD and depression.  

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Meet my friend, the mediocre hedge fund manager

-
There is no such thing as smart money.   Yet, when was the last time you heard some one described as a "below-average hedge fund manager?" Probably never. Or a "mediocre physicist?" That's because these two professions seem mystical to people who don't stop to question that at least half of the hedge fund managers--and physicists-- graduated in the bottom 50% of their university peer group. Yet look at the HFRI Equity Hedge Index compared to investing in a no-fee indexed S&P fund since 1996--the last 20 years.   (Note:   you've been screwed in either case so don't hold your breath).  Yes, all those wicked smart hedge fund guys (remember their nice suits from back in the late 90's?) rocked along at 13% annual returns from '96 til early '00.   So did the S&P. Since then it's been a negative shithouse for the guys who get their drawn portraits published in the WSJ.   Between ''08 and '13 a dollar invested i...
Read more

What are OpenAi’s major sources of revenue

-
It's a $4B company.   OpenAI generates revenue through several key channels, with a significant portion stemming from its ChatGPT offerings and API services. Here's a breakdown of its major income sources: 1.  ChatGPT Subscriptions (Approximately 76% of Revenue) OpenAI's primary revenue stream comes from its ChatGPT subscription services: ChatGPT Plus: Priced at $20 per month, this tier accounts for about 55% of OpenAI's total revenue, translating to approximately $1.9 billion annually.   ChatGPT Enterprise: Targeting large organizations, this plan contributes around 21% of the company's revenue.   ChatGPT Team: Designed for small to medium-sized teams, this offering adds about 8% to OpenAI's revenue.   Collectively, these subscription models provide OpenAI with a stable and recurring income stream. 2.  API and Developer Access (Approximately 15% of Revenue) OpenAI of...
Read more

Schedule crunch--and what it taught me

-
I woke up anxious and even a bit angry this morning…an old habit from the past that has diminished somewhat as I've recovered.   And then it hit me…I have a 7:30 meeting that I'm leading and I'm not ready.  I have an 8:45 Masters Ski group workout and if I'm not prompt the group takes off without me.  I have a critical board meeting at noon, and I haven't covered the materials.    And I have guests coming for a week on Sunday, so I'll partially lose control of my schedule.  That may be the worst.  My response was to schedule a group dinner during the week so I'd keep in touch with some of my new friends in town.  A bad pairing…NYC friends and mountain town friends. What do you cook???   Conclusion at the moment…5:33 AM:  I will be happiest for the next months living alone.  With no one in my space other than my two cats, who slept next to me in a joint cuddling ball all night.    I do not want to sha...
Read more