Returning home

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Will my life improve when I get back? I don't know why it should.

I'm still not sure about anti-depressants. I have no interest in sex but I don't know if that's serotonin syndrome, or a side effect of PTSD from my divorce. The good news: I don't care. And the sertraline appears to minimize anxiety.

Other than that frequent intimating? I'm 70. Digestive issues? Who knows? Fatigue. Possible.

Anyway on with life either way with my now two cats and no one else. I don't want companionship for this part of my life. I don't want to help others. I want to take care of my new house, make it into a place I love, and find ways to treasure myself.

So much self-hate! Boring. I'm bored. Really bored. Smile. Deep breaths. Change my worn out physiology.

Walk myself home. With gentleness and compassion and gratitude. I made it. Alone.

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