On the trail to reduced PTSD

You think you know better, ghost at the drop of a hat, and work relentlessly to destroy your friends behind their backs. There's no remedy or treatment for this personality disorder. Psychedelics are ineffective and not recommended. 

Depression and PTSD--my mental health disorders. Psychedelics are finally providing effective treatment for people like me.  Ketamine gave me an alternative to post-traumatic anxiety.  I hope to get to pure self-love by the end of my life.  That's my life project for now.  I wish I'd avoided the 30 years with nothing to show but failure, isolation, judgement, and abandonment.  

I still haven't found anything that lifts my depression.

You disappear in those moments when I can focus on the present, rather than the anxiety of the past or the fear for my future. Those moments are as sweet as seeing the end of a long trail when you've taken a very wrong turn together early on.  Our marriage was worse than that Mt Lola hike for me.  That was only one day, and only 10 extra miles.