Short reflections on my disastrous marriagr

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 I see empty barren fields where no gratitude grew. Only disappointment. 

I see myself ignored by passing trucks, unable to hitch a ride to anywhere I wanted to be. 

I see a dead weight on the other side of the bed from me night after night. 

I see a funeral for my endless capacity for love and happiness…and then the final incineration before I became the ashes I am today.  

Horrid demons circling a toxic waste dump 

Mina—don’t hurt too many others as you walk yourself home.  I cared for you but all I have for my efforts is disappointment and heartache, and looking back I see nothing but a legacy of emotional stinginess and gaslighting You presented an image of yourself that I don’t think even you liked, and that everyone could see through—but for whatever reason you maintained in lieu of authenticity  honesty  generosity, connection, or love.  You sold your good self to your own illusion, leaving nothing kind for me.  Your spiritual and emotional debt to others is beyond assessment, and I doubt you will be judged well should atonement be required  



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